Rabbit Holes and Fairy Tales

Can you think of one great Irish artist?  Off the top of my head I can't.  I can think of a few writers, does that count?  Now, the interesting thing about this, is that there are some people that will think I am talking derogatorily about the Irish because they are not on my radar artistically speaking.  They might even say, because I can't come up with an Irish artist, that I am speaking badly about the Irish.  It is all about perception. 

As a conservative I have been called many names as a result of my opinions:  Repukelican, Fascist, Idiot, Uninformed, Ignorant,  just to name a few. I'm hardly a speaker for the Republican Party.  That's up to them to do.  What I dislike, is that if I have a particular point of view, I can't have that discussion without having to explain that just because I stand for a conservative issue, that I am not rich,  I don't listen to Rush Limbaugh, I'm not a colorless cardboard cutout that spouts party policy, and I don't think the way I do because someone told me to.  In fact I have to tell you I'm reading a lot right now in order to understand what is being said and am trying to stay informed. 

So let's go through it...I'm not rich.  I wasn't born to rich parents.  My dad has an amazing story of being brought up in poverty, parents never owning a home, and buying houses to rent to the less fortunate when we finally got our own home...but that's another story.  He went into the military before I was born and we lived in a tiny little trailer off base.  We lived in a trailer until I was in 1st grade when my dad went to college the only way they could afford it: the GI bill, which he worked for.  We lived in a trailer until we moved to a home that had remained empty for some time and had most of the windows broken out.  My parents fixed the house enough that we could live in it while they worked to keep the cars going and the utilities paid.   It was during this time that they were working about 80 hrs a week to keep up the rentals for the less fortunate, not usually making more than what the mortgages were.  They did save enough money to buy some property and built a house on it.  My parents, myself,  and a few of my dads students built the house because they couldn't afford to have someone else do the project.  I did get to go to college with help from my parents and loans.  I know it wasn't easy but they always put me first so that I wouldn't have to do what they did.

I'm not rich now.  We live in a modest home which was in such bad shape we couldn't even live in it for the first 6 months and have continued to renovate it for the last 9 yrs.  My husband is currently laid off.  We have one child because that is what we could afford.  I drive an 11 yr old car which I'm not complaining about because I have a car.  We have under $1500 in credit card debt because we chose not to have cards. We put our daughter in private school out of necessity not desire because even though we couldn't really afford it, it was the right thing to do for her.

I don't currently listen to Rush Limbaugh.  I did use to listen to Rush sometime in the 90's.  I thought he was entertaining and had some very valid ideas.  I already believed most of the things he had to say, so it was nice to know someone else was out there.  To be honest I have gotten more out of Dr. Laura and continue to listen to her today.

I'm not a colorless cardboard cutout that spouts party policy.  I'm a conservative person with conservative ideas.   I can't imagine that anyone could agree with everything the party that best describes them says, is 100% correct.  If they do, they don't research and are taking things on blind faith.  I choose to know what I think, not what the party thinks.  Didn't your dad ever tell you that "just because someone jumps off a bridge, doesn't mean you have to"?  So no, I don't think anything because someone else told me it is right.

I don't believe in the healthcare bill not because I'm a Republican, but because I don't like what it says.  I don't want our government any more powerful than it currently is.  They already own more than they should as a government.  I didn't like some of George Bush's policies and I don't like most of Barack Obama's policies.   I have an opinion and just because mine is not yours, does not make us mortal enemy's.  I won't call you names if you don't call me names...agreed?

Have you ever......

I can talk here so freely...that and chat where no one else hears my words.  It's funny how media has made us feel like we are so able to put our thoughts out there because we assume no one is really reading. I think, with a few exceptions, that may be true.

It's driving me crazy that I can't tell anyone we are selling the house.  Actually I'm talking to people whenever they ask directly, but I can't shout it from the rooftops because Tracy hasn't mentioned it to his family yet.  The funny thing is, I'm not exactly sure why.  We talk about it and he seems to be very sure of the decision to move away.  We rarely see them and most communication is on the phone or through text messaging or instant message.  It seems to me, that past the one time a year that we gather, they don't know where we live anyway.  In fact none of his 8 siblings have even been to our house now that I think about it.  Still, it is for him to break the news....maybe he is hoping they will nurture some regret that they haven't tried to spend more time with us...maybe they would even be sad that they haven't taken the time to know Sarah better?  Having had no siblings I'm not sure about that whole "sibling" thing.  They are entirely differently people....we are conservative, they are liberals.  It's not just the political thing, it's the social thing.  Maybe we just don't seem that "fun". 

I can't wait to get out of "sin" city.  It's actually far from "sinful" in the area we live in.  When you go 45 minutes off the strip, it's just a bunch of families trying to get away from the craziness.  I won't miss it...well, maybe I'll miss the moderate temperatures all year long.

This is a scattered, brain twisting way of saying I'm just ready to be on a new path.  I'm sorry to not be able to see friends and family here, but it is how it is.  I can't make it any different just because I have tried to make it so.  Come on house.....sell today so we can start!